How The Video Vixen Taught Me (Almost) Everything I Knew About Being A Woman

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If you were a pre-teen or older in the early 2000’s, then you know like I know that video chicks were the creme de la creme. Sure, strippers got some shine as well as the around-the-way chicks but video vixens were living that life of Crystal showers and Gucci Gucci Gucci. Since social media was no where near what it is today (& I am seriously so thankful), there were a lot less instafamous chicks running around. 

As a little backdrop, my mother passed away when I was on the brink of becoming a teen and blossoming into a woman. I didn’t have another woman around to teach me all of the things that my friends with moms got to learn. I would list those things but to be honest, I am still learning so many of them.

At that same time, I was really getting into music videos and video chicks that had big ol’ booties, rotund breasts, and dressed like semi classy prostitutes. More than that, they were lusted after, wanted, practically begged for like they held the secrets to life at the meeting of their thighs. As long as I can remember, I wanted that. I wanted to be her. I wanted to have a trail of men panting behind me with heart shapes bulging out of their eyes. The video vixen taught me that sexy was all that mattered. My vagina was my prize to be won. My body was like a cheap motel to be rented out to the highest bidder; good enough to sleep in but just for one night. I missed the lessons of womanhood that covered self preservation, self love, and standing up for who I am with both feet firmly on the ground.

Now that I am on the other side of that thought process and unlearning the lessons of the video vixens of the 99 and 2000’s, I can see in other women what I once saw in myself. Their value and worth is easily accessible with a quick spread of their legs. A man, or another woman, can slide themselves between these ladies legs and lap up whatever is there for them to enjoy and leave behind nothing but dust. Their vaginas become nothing more than a wide set receptacle for the insecurities, and wistful lust of their partners.

I have grown up, I believe, quite a bit since my fascination with the video girls when I was 13 and I’ve learned to love Latifah more since that time.



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